You know, the offer that I got was pretty awesome, but something in me told me that I should not take up the offer. Though my parents and fiance supported me, I feel that I'm lack of confidence in myself. What MIL said make senses too. All she's afraid of me forgetting who I am.

Yes, I rejected the offer.

But then again, she sent me e-mails wanting me to try it out, saying who knows I'll do great?
Well, it's heartbreaking to reject something that I have been wanting and dreaming of to be, something that I want to do in future. But it doesn't seems right. It might be a great experience, but I don't want to take the risk.

Though, in local, we have a lot of competitors, I think it's better I take up the challenge here.

I'm sorry. Maybe, after when I get married, I'll see you there? Just.... Maybe..



Sorry for the lack of updates.. I'm too occupied with some errands..

Well, I have a great news. Guess what??

I got a job offer as a make-up artist in Australia.. Great, isn't it? See, make-up is my thing. I have always wanted to be a make-up artist, and I have always wanted to live in Australia. And now, it's a dream come true.. But then again, I'll be there for 5 years, maybe? And the thought of leaving everything I have in Singapore makes me want to reject this offer. But then again, it's my dream job.

I can't live without my parents, I can't live without my Fiance. I can't bring them along. They need to get a job there just to be with me. It's a great great offer. I don't wanna say "NO". I wanna say "YES". But being away from Singapore for that long years? I'm gonna get married soon you know?

Baby, can we get married now, then migrate to Australia? Please???



Whenever I've found my happiness, there are always obstacles along the way. Don't talk about friends now.

I never felt like I have a sister (although I have one). Until, I got close to my cousin who treated me like I'm her own. She has her own younger sister who is already married with 2 beautiful kids. Well, Facebook has brought me close to the people I never once got closed with, people I never knew.

See, I have been living for 20 years now, and she has been living for 30 years. Throughout my 18 years, never once I tried talking to her in a sisterly manner, until one day, when we decided to meet up. Things between us turned sweeter and eventually we became so close that I felt that she was like my own sister. We lived just across the street, and we often meet up.

Well, yesterday was my first day out with her and her sister(together with her 2 gorgeous kids). It was a bit awkward to talk to her sister, though she is also my cousin. See, she always commented on my Fb, if I upload my status about my day with her sister. She have never commented on nice things, thus, her words always sounded like she's jealous. So, I thought she was just joking around.

So, yesterday seemed a bit fine. Until today when I saw her status update on how she felt she was being pushed aside. Frankly, I felt the hurt. Cause the way she put in her words, is like she's accusing me of snatching her sister away from her. I swear I know how it feels, cos I felt the same way too when my sister found her bestfriend and no longer in talking and good terms with me.

I love being around the elder sister. Cause with her, I can be a friend, a listening ear, I can be myself. I feel bad.. What should I do? I seriously feel so bad.. So so bad for doing this to her.. If I would have known earlier that this would bring a great impact on her, I would not have hurt her feelings.. BUT! I swear I don't mean to hurt her, it has never crossed my mind.. NEVER!

I'm sorry if I hurt you in any way..



Dear Sharifah Nurzaiha,

Please take good care of my Omnia. Since you've destroyed one of my precious phones, you better take extra good care of this one.

Dear Omnia, You have been a great buddy for the last few months. Thanks for being the one who accompanied me everywhere I go. You sure remembered where I brought you to.. the toilet, the bed, to my office, in my bag, in my pocket, to China... I will miss you. But then again, I'm sorry that I have to let you go. You have a new owner now.. Please, treat her good ok? Though I have a new buddy now, you should not get jealous, cos I love you first. Good bye...

Dear Iphone,
Welcome to my life. I will be your new owner from now on. I swear I will be good to you. I swear I will..

Dear Bacin ku Yang Tercinta,
Thank you so much for the new baby. It was a great surprise. I never thought you would get that for me. Yeah! So we finally have the same ideal phone now..

So, yeaaaahh for me.. I finally got the Iphone(though I've been using it for awhile, dint get the chance to update lah!).. Thanks to my beloved Fiance who has been the generous soul to buy me a white Iphone (first hand ok :p) in 32gb, while he got himself one too, but in black. I am a one happy girl..

But but but, now... My itouch how?? I already got a Iphone, I don't need the itouch already..
Nevermind, time for me to be generous and give it to daddy.. =)



Things between us is finally and slowly back to normal. Eventhough she can't still look me in the eye.. Remembered that day when I woke up then she came in the room and then covered her face.. Hahaha.. How cute! She even made me a tuna sandwich, that tasted so so good. Made with love eh? Hehehehe..

So now, the friendship that we've build for more than 10 years is turning sour. First, let me ask you. Do you like people call you names? Do you like people taking advantage of you? I'm sure you don't, don't you?

Well, in short, it happened/s to me. How I feel?? Ask me, and I'll tell you.

Then again, I asked myself..









Dear YOU,

I have read your blog, and you should know what comes next. Tears..

I am now, sitting in my humble office when I thought about you. How much I miss you, your laughter, and how you would make me smile whenever I feel down. How you woke me up early in the morning, snuggling beside me, though you know it stinks. And everytime I'm out, I would call you asking what food you and your family wants. Well, that's past.

I never knew that whats posted on my blog brought a huge impact on you, and Mom. I knew it was my biggest mistake ever, and I sincerely apologies. The thought about everything makes me wanna puke everything out.

I miss those times I shared with you. Seriously baby, I miss you. By now, you should know how much I love you, how much difference you brought to my life. How much I treasure every minute spent with you. There's only 9 months left before I'm legally yours. Pls, let's just make up and start afresh?

I forbidden myself from visiting you, cos i wanted to give you time to recuperate everything. Though most of the times, I waited at the void deck, in order not to be seen by anyone. I forced myself not think of these whenever I'm down, but I can't help it. These things is just getting the hell out of me. And to be honest, I was stalking you. Yes, I did, and I still do. I just can't help it. I care too much for you that every minute of my life seems like something missing.

I miss the way you called after you cried, telling me your problems and everything. I miss the glimpse of you. Everything about you. I don't want to sound like I'm desperate or a lesbo. All I want you to know, is that I MISS EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. And I know, you miss me too, right sweetheart?

Forgive me sayang.. Forgive me.. I beg of you..








I have never been happier when I have these 2 people by my side. They brighten up my days. See how we grew up together? From primary school, to secondary school (they both were in the same school, but were still in contact), to ITE. I know, they are the true friends, that money or anything else in this world can't trade for. I am seriously proud of US.


We used to be always in a short term relationship, but look at us now. We have found the right person whom we want to share our lives with.

Every crisis and misunderstanding we had, we managed to go through without any hassle. And I got a feeling, that this friendship will last forever, Insya-Allah.

I bet people are jealous of us. Awww, don't be. You'll find one if you are a true friend.

So anyway, tonight is going to be our first night of fun. No, don't get the wrong idea just yet. Just wait for my next post, so you'll know.

I love them to bits and pieces. See you girls tonight!



Tentatively, there might be changes in my marriage plan..
But still, Insya-Allah, everything will be a great one.. Hopefully..

Currently, I have nothing to blog about. But I just feel like typing (though I type every single minute).
What should I blog about?

Oh great! Remember about the mysterious guy which I blogged about yesterday? Well, he didn't visit me yesterday. Or maybe he knows I'm too tired to meet him, even in my dreams. Hmm.. I know it sounds crappy to fall in love or miss the guy in you dreams. I mean, yeah, com'on, I know it will never be a reality to meet that kind of guy in this earth. Maybe he's an alien from outa space? Ok lame.. But seriously, who could that be? I'm unable to see his face. I don't know his name, where he came from etc etc.. But the thing is, we look so perfect together.
Oh bby! Sorry to say all this, but its just a dream.

Oh alright.. Enough of "him"..

Well, gotta go now. I suddenly have this guilty feeling and I feel so so bad about it. I really shouldn't have done that.

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♥ Better known as SASHA
♥ Perpetual Love with ALIF
♥ Turns a year older on every 11 January
♥ Nicotine
♥ Alcoholic
♥ I LOVE myself
♥ Career as a Sales & Admin Executive & Head of Department
♥ Adores Winnie The Pooh & Diamonds
♥ Addicted to my personal drug called ALIF(:
♥ I do make-up for engagements only
For enquiry,e-mail me at shasha.sajariah@gmail.com
OR
Sajariah Mohamad